Dear New Mum...

I don't really remember a whole lot about the early days after Freddie was born. Its all still quite fuzzy. What I do remember though, is that no text book or online expert was going to prepare me for the reality of life as a new mum! 

I felt like I was drowning. 

Drowning in the enormity of the responsibility now lying in my arms.

Drowning in sleepless nights.

 Drowning in the constant feeding.

Drowning in anxiety.

Drowning in dirty nappies. (I mean, come on, who knew one tiny human could poo THAT much)

Drowning in too many 'Not a clue what I'm doing here' moments.

But above all of that...

Drowning in the deep, deep  love I had for my new little human! 

Who even knew a love like that was possible? 

I am only two and a half years into motherhood - I'm no expert! Flip, I learn about ten new things every day! Toddler life is not to be underestimated - never mind throwing a new brother into the mix! Poor Freddie! 

But I would love to share with you FIVE things that I have learnt since I became a mum!

1. YOU ARE AMAZING!

Yes! You! I mean, you have just given birth! Maybe you had a difficult start to motherhood. Maybe your wee one needed some extra care after he/she was born. Maybe you are still recovering from a traumatic birth experience.  It takes super-human strength to get through those first few weeks and months of motherhood. You will get there! You, new mum, are AMAZING!

2. YOU NEED TO CUT YOURSELF SOME SLACK!

I think I must say at least five times a day, "I can't do this", "I'm not cut out for motherhood", "I am failing my kids" and I need to STOP! Motherhood is a JOURNEY and it take a lifetime. I would say that my own Mum would admit she still hasn't got it sussed! Here's the thing, we are only human.  we will make mistakes.  we will feel overwhelmed. we will feel like running away. Thats OK! That's motherhood for you! But, what I am saying is, don't sweat the small stuff. Its no joke raising kids. Its a lot harder than those self-help books make out! Give yourself a break! You are doing a heck of a lot better than you give yourself credit for! 

3. ITS OK TO SAY NO!

After Freddie was born I felt like I was constantly saying YES to things that I wanted to say NO to. Yes, you can nurse my sleeping baby. Yes, you can come to my house the day after I have given birth. Yes, Yes, Yes.

Second time round? I have been saying NO a lot more. You have to do what is best for you and your baby. If that means you have to become a social hermit for a few months, so be it. If it means unintentionally offending friends and family, so be it! You and your new baby come first! 

4. SORRY, IT DOESN'T GET ANY EASIER! 

Sorry for the negativity with this one! But its the truth! So many people told me it would get easier - wee liars! LOL

It doesn't get easier because the challenges keep changing! 

Just when you think you have nailed one thing, they throw you another ball! 

What does happen though, is that you find the strength you need to keep going! 

You learn so much in that first year, never mind in the years to follow. 

I don't think I will every say this is easy! 

5. FOR EVERY BAD DAY, THERE ARE MANY MORE GOOD! 

For every poonami, I raise you that first smile.

For every sleepless night, I raise you that first giggle.

For every tantrum, I raise you that first "mama".

You get the gist! 

I recently read something that said, 

"Motherhood is messy,

and challenging,

and crazy,

and sleepless,

and giving, 

and still unbelievably,

BEAUTIFUL"

I totally second that! 

Thanks for reading! 

Grace

xx